You Complete Me

I'm sure many of you have seen the movie, Jerry Maguire with Tom Cruise and Renee Zellweger.  There's an emotional scene toward the end that has gone down in romantic fame.  Tom Cruise rushes in to Renee Zellweger's home and declares to her, "You complete me."  He rambles on a little before she stops him and says, "Stop.  You had me at hello."  Cue the "awwws."

While that sounds romantic and sweet, it is also an extremely dangerous approach to love.  God never intended another person to complete us.  He completes us.  When two incomplete people enter into a relationship, they don't become one complete person.  They become two incomplete people now messing each others' lives up.  I don't know how many marriages I've seen wrecked by the disillusionment that their mate was supposed to make them complete.  When they find out that this isn't the case, they assume that they married the wrong person.

Your spouse was not designed to complete you.  Nor were they meant to be responsible for your thoughts, emotions, beliefs or behaviors.  You are 100% responsible for your thoughts, emotions, beliefs and behaviors.

A relationship of two complete people who aren't dependent on each other for their happiness is a beautiful thing.  When my wife is sad, it impacts me deeply.  When I disappoint my wife, it impacts her deeply.  But I don't look to her to be responsible for my happiness.  And I certainly don't want to be responsible for hers.

Likewise, it is a mistake of huge proportions to have children hoping they will make you complete.  If you don't have it without kids, you won't have it with them.  Same with your spouse.  If you aren't complete and whole without a mate, you won't be complete or whole with one.

It's time we all start looking to God who created us and say, "You complete me."  I promise, you will find your relationships bringing so much more joy.